Inspiring Women Who Are Rethinking Drinking Volume 6

Meet Rachelle

You might be familiar with the term FOMO, but have you heard about JOMO? Our boozeless babe Rachelle describes being alcohol-free as the Joy of Missing Out.

Meet Rachelle, an administrative assistant for a union in Alberta, a proud dog mom and music lover — there’s always music and laughter in the air around Rachelle. Alcohol served as a way for Rachelle to forge more meaningful connections by allowing for vulnerability in her life. But as she started to rethink alcohol’s hold on her life, she realized that it couldn’t be a friend, nor could it help her to be her best self for others. She is now alcohol-free and proud. Read more about her journey toward genuine vulnerability, and all that she’s learned below!

Tell us a bit about yourself — what do you do for a living? What makes you happy? 

My name is Rachelle and I am 29 years old, I am happily married and a doggo mom to two big boys, Thrasher and Patches. I am an Administrative Assistant for a union in Edmonton, Alberta.  

What makes me happy: The mountains are my favourite place; I always feel completely free when I am there. I love to road-trip, driving makes me feel at ease like I can forget my worries. I love the clouds, the sky and the feeling of the sun on my face. You can catch my husband and I watching every sunset possible on our back deck. I collect ‘90s Hip Hop records and love all genres of music, I have it playing almost always. Most of all, I enjoy making people laugh, genuine connections and laughing until my stomach hurts with those I care about. 

What role has alcohol played in your life? 

Alcohol played a large role in my life because addiction runs in my family. From a young age alcohol was present. When I started drinking it was a way for me to open up and put my anxiety aside in social situations, to feel emotions I bottled up or allow people to see me vulnerable because in regular life I felt I had no choice but to be tough to survive. 

“When I started drinking it was a way for me to open up and put my anxiety aside in social situations, to feel emotions I bottled up or allow people to see me vulnerable because in regular life I felt I had no choice but to be tough to survive.”

What was the moment you decided to rethink drinking? 

In early 2020 after a night out, I was filled with embarrassment with my behaviour from the prior evening. I cried to my husband that I had enough of myself. I have been sober-curious since that point but one day in 2021, I woke up and realized I truly hated alcohol, what it had done to the people I care for and how it made me feel, I haven’t looked back since.  

Has the change in your relationship with alcohol been easy or difficult? What do you think contributed to this for you?  

It has been easy for me; but only because I was at a point in my life that I had chalked up enough embarrassment/regret from drunk decisions to last a lifetime. I was tired of saying I wanted to quit without follow-through because I was afraid of other people's reactions/judgements. 

What kind of tools/prompts/books/podcasts did you use to help you on your journey toward rethinking alcohol? Do you still use these tools?  

I was determined and made the decision to do this 100%, no matter what and that’s what I did. With that being said, I go to traditional therapy, which made me feel comfortable enough to make a lot of big lifestyle changes. I read a lot of Quit Lit and Self-Help books: Quit Like a Woman by Holly Whitaker, We Are The Luckiest By Laura McKowen, The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray, Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents by Lindsay Gibson and The Emotionally Absent Mother by Jasmin Lee Cori are a few of my favourite books. I also listen to Podcasts: A Sober Girls Guide, Recovery Happy Hour and The After Party to name a few.

I still use these tools and probably always will. It makes a difference to hear other individuals’ stories who may be going through similar situations. Feeling a part of a bigger collective changed everything for me. 

Do you feel apprehensive about sharing your decision to rethink alcohol with others in your family/social group?

At first, I was apprehensive to share with certain people in my social circle, but I realized quickly that I can’t force anyone to understand, and I don’t want to either. At this point in my life, I will only surround myself with people who motivate and support me, and I am no longer afraid of allowing anyone else to fall away. I am secure in my choice not to drink.

“It makes a difference to hear other individuals’ stories who may be going through similar situations. Feeling a part of a bigger collective changed everything for me.”

What are some benefits you have experienced since rethinking the place alcohol holds in your life?   

I no longer wake up feeling regret or embarrassment after a night out. I don’t experience horrible two-day hangovers. I remember everything that happened and get to hold those good memories tight. I was able to let go of unnecessary pressure to hold onto relationships that weren't working.

What were some common triggers you noticed that caused you to want to grab a glass of wine and what are you doing now to surf the urge? 

Emotional situations that I felt I couldn’t handle or didn’t want to think about. Over the last couple of years, I did this at least 90% less but it was a trigger before for sure. Warm weather and patio season, because in Alberta we get very little time to enjoy the summer before we are in a deep freeze again. FOMO.  

I threw my FOMO in the trash and decided to rename it JOMO - Joy of Missing Out. When it comes to alcohol, I changed my perspective that I was missing out on drinking because I wasn’t. It was the same old song and dance, weekend after weekend. I am lucky I still have a choice not to drink. Many people don’t get that opportunity and I refuse to take it for granted.  

How did removing alcohol from your life contribute to your role as caregiver and/or as a working professional?  

I am thankful that alcohol never impacted my ability to work or care for the people in my life.  

“Align yourself with people who are dedicated to bettering themselves, follow and reach out to the sober community and make friends. It is easier to rethink drinking when you do not feel you’re doing it alone.”

How has your physical activity benefited from removing alcohol?   

My physical activity has improved, I have more motivation to move my body because I am not a hungover mess on the weekends anymore.   

What is your top piece of advice that you would give to someone who might want to rethink drinking? 

If you’re unsure about removing alcohol but aren’t 100% ready to take the plunge, become sober-curious first. Align yourself with people who are dedicated to bettering themselves, follow and reach out to the sober community and make friends. It is easier to rethink drinking when you do not feel you’re doing it alone.  

Check out last week’s boozeless babe Kinza here!

About Rachelle Weisgerber

 Rachelle is a 29-year-old living in chilly Edmonton, Alberta with her husband and two dogs. She is a 90’s hip hop record, tattoo flash print & plant collector who enjoys one too many black coffees and laughing until her stomach hurts.